My Multiple Sleeping Partners.

 I stirred in my sleep, my smile from the night before lingering on as the sun rays gently fall upon my bed. Ishq Wala Love plays in the background. My eyes are shut, but I’m fully awake. Last night coming back to me in flashes. It was a perfect night, my smile only widens. I turn around, getting a little more comfortable inside the big white blanket. I open my eyes a little, the raised outline next to me breathes slowly, deeply… all the fatigue from last night…

The movie, the popcorn, the wine, the dessert… My smile getting wider and wider.

“WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT THAT ALARM!!” She blares next to me from somewhere inside the blanket.

My eyes snap open. I fumble around for my phone, shit! I forgot to shut my 7am gym alarm. My screen flashes “GYM TIME BABY!” as Ishq Wala Love plays on. Many times I’ve been asked why I’ve not kept my alarm something, well more, alarming… But with the lack of a “Good morning baby” phone call these days, I’ve come to realize that I would prefer wooing love songs than gentle cooing on the phone any day. Thus, from Paani Da, to Ishq Wala Love, to Heer my alarm changes almost monthly.

Stretching I turn around, my friend still fast asleep next to me. I look at the yellow curtains, all warm with the sunlight. For reasons I can’t explain, I stretch my arm out from under my comfortable white snuggly blanket and reach out to the warmth. My eyes shut, the warm sun gently kisses my skin. I sigh audibly. I hear a grunt. Then I feel something more than warm sunlight on my hand. I freeze. Sloppy….sticky…furry… grunting…. Oh god. I prayed. With all the courage I had, I peeked from under my safe haven, it was The Dog.

With his huge eyes and lopsided smile he proceeded to lick my hand. I groaned. I turned to my friend, Little B is what I lovingly call her, and asked her to please take her (full grown) “Puppy” outside. A kick on my bum is enough for me to realize she will not be moving right now.

More groaning. As much as I want to stay inside my blanket, I have to get up to wash my puppy-licked arm.

As I walk to the bathroom with this not-so-little Dog at my heels, I think about all the people I’ve been ‘privileged’ enough to share my bed with. Don’t get too naughty…. I’m talking about my best friends and some of their amazing relatives, who may seem shy to talk to, but wow… one should hear their roars once the lights are out!

I decided to make a list of my favorites (or not):

1)     The Sleep-Waker:
There’s Little B. Vaguely I remembered a little stirring in the blanket that woke me up. With half an eye open, I saw her eyes shut, she sat up, took her pillow, then sit still for almost three seconds, after which she lay back down, put the pillow on her face this time and slept off.

My reaction: Sigh. Turn around and fall back to sleep immediately.

2)     The Sleep-Talker:
This one is a not so favorite incident.
My best friend’s family friend from Australia was visiting. Three of us decide to sleep on one bed, (bad decision) with me ending up in the middle (worst decision), just after watching Insidious (WHY?!!)
With my best friend (who can’t be woken up with a blaring trumpet) sleeping next to me comfortably, I turned and tossed to find a perfect spot for me to eventually fall asleep. Eyes shut, lights off, silence in the room….

Someone murmured something. My eyes open.  She’s fair by the way, with curly hair and big eyes (which were luckily shut… or else I would be now writing this from my grave). Her lips were slightly open, I wondered, could it be her.
And her it was. Ranging from a variety of abuses, to questions, to statements… she talked on and on into the night.

My reaction: Put a pillow between us, hug my friend, and PRAY.

3)     The Sleep-Kicker:
I am sure all of us have had/been one of these in our lifetime. There’s always that one little sister (in my case) or friend who just always seems to be a little too sporty in bed (for all the wrong reasons!) And while anyone whose read Fifty Shades of Grey would like to wake up with bruises and sores, this dear fan, is not one of those ways.
With a little sister that kicked more than she slept. I quickly got used to putting numerous pillows between us. She however, managed to quickly change the kicking to punching, to slapping, to finally me sleeping on the floor instead of next to her.

My reaction: Pillows or change of bed !

If I actually sit to do this, I am sure that I would have a list that would reach 100. But of course, there are those who have a league of their own… The ones who wake up screaming, the ones who sing Happy Birthday at the top of their lungs at 3am, the ones who end up cuddling by your side in the morning, the ones who snore louder than any lion heard, the ones who curl up into a giant ball at the edge of the bed, the one who snuggles and loves to wrap themselves all around you, the ones who sleep on their backs in the ‘dead’ position, the ones who sleep with their mouths open as flies dance around their drool wildly…. And so on and so forth.

Lucky for me, I’ve always managed to find interesting people to sleep next to. As for me, I’ve been told I cuddle, snore, curl up into a corner and am popularly known to steal blankets and pillows and anything else that gives me that little extra warmth.

Here’s to more interesting bed adventures in the future, until then, it’s just me throwing this dog out of the room, locking the door on his dear face and curling up inside my big blanket of warmth.



And there’s another kick on my bum.





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